I Don't Think You're Ready For This Jelly

A totally random thought for the day, but.....

As, arguably, one of the biggest sweet tooths on the planet, this is a random observation I have had over the course of the past month or so.  Since Fridays during the summer (at least in my industry) are prime for vacation and tend to be cut short, those of us who are actually in the office try to make it a little extra "special" for each other.  How you might ask?  Simple...doughnuts!

I always find it very interesting to see the variety of doughnuts purchased by one individual to the next; however, my favorite discovery is that almost everyone feels obligated to buy at least one jelly-filled doughnut.  And every time, no one ever eats it.  NEVER.  Why is that?

I mean, it is my own, personal opinion that they are disgusting, but is there really no one out there who enjoys these Bismarks?  I even attempted a cursory check online to see if any studies have been done on this subject. 

After approximately 2 minutes of useless results, I decided I no longer cared nor did I feel the need to proceed with this research project.  Judging by the lack of readily available information, I was able to draw the conclusion that, much like my own workplace, the masses no longer have a desire for this dying breed of pastry.

They really bring nothing to the party, when you think about it:

• The obvious mess in consumption.

• No glaze, sprinkles or icing, all key elements to a successful pastry.

• Too much dough.

• If powdered sugar must be used, jelly doughnuts really have nothing on beignets (which I would prefer to only consume in the great city of New Orleans).

• The jelly itself is often suspect at best.

So the next time you partake in a sweet treat for breakfast, be sure to get at least one jelly to test the waters amongst your core group of colleagues and/or acquaintances.  My guess is that no one will touch that thing or, if they do, it is because there are literally no remaining options available.....and they are starving and/or most likely hungover.

I guess it is true what they say...we really ARE NOT ready for that jelly.

Tuesday Trash Dump - REALLY!?!

Sorry, Seth and Amy.  So much is going on that I have to briefly rip off your Weekend Update sketch and create a segment of my own....

REALLY, Chad Ochocinco Johnson?  Head-butting your jersey chaser wife over a suspect box of condoms?  Look, I think she may have actually head-butted you just as much as the next guy, but who landed themselves in the big house and who in the ER?!  You are killing me here, man...


REALLY, Miami Dolphins?  Just like that he is cut?  We have actual owners of illegal weapons, drug dealers, murderers and animals killers playing in the league, but this is where we draw the line?  Child Pleeez.

REALLY, Katy Perry and John Mayer?  How did I miss that?!


REALLY, 90210?  Ryan Locthe acting?  Have you ever heard him speak?  I mean, REALLY?

REALLY, Elton John?  Put that pasty, cellulite-filled thing away.  No one needs to be exposed to that!


REALLY, Louis Vuitton?  Michael Phelps, model?  Is this a joke?

Friday Favorites

• HBO's Hard Knocks - yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!  After being forced to take a year off due to last year's strike, I was more than overdue for some Hard Knocks when it debuted last Sunday night.  This year, the focus is on the Miami Dolphins, whom I generally do not care about at all...until now!  My boy Chad Ochocinco Johnson is now on the team, and thank God.  Otherwise this team is bound for boredom.

• Fantasy Football - it's that time of year again.  The BEST time of year.  Pre-season is underway and that means Fantasy Football fans everywhere are starting to tune in to keep up with who their sleeper picks will be for the upcoming season.  We just set our draft date this week for my league, so we are EXTRA excited and starting to really prep!  Now, I just need to think of a great team name.....

• This card, because I am clearly on a football roll here!

• The Olympics - because it is great for world morale.  For 2 weeks every 4 years, we get to unite.  Sure, we may not be cheering for the same countries, teams or even people, but still.....we care about the same thing and have a unified goal.  WIN!  A congrats to the USWNT as well for their killer redemption over Japan!

• Shark Week - premieres this Sunday! 

Time Flies....

even when you are not having fun, apparently!  Or at least not entirely....

I cannot believe it has been so long since I have been able to post something - yikes!  Between work and my devotion to the XXX Olympiad, I have been burning the candle at both ends, no doubt.  Did I mention I fit in a trip to NYC as well?! 

Allow me to briefly highlight the most important piece of the puzzle that has kept me away....The Olympics! 

Every 4 years, the sport I grew up with gets its chance to shine.  SWIMMING!  JEAH! (please excuse idiotic Ryan Lochte language...I cannot help myself). 

The 2012 games were pleasantly surprising as the USA was down in veterans and were thought to be a real underdog team, as a whole, going into the competition.  Despite the obvious disappointments in performances from Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte, we still managed to dominate the sport in both individual events AND relays.  Some real up and comers emerged as the future of USA Swimming, a la 17 year old Missy Franklin, reminding us that we are still going to be left in good hands as we journey into the retirement of the great Michael Phelps. 

A few not so new faces even came to life in events that were just down right unexpected....

Who could have imagined that Brendan Hansen would successfully make a come back at 30 and make it to the podium from lane 8 in the final?!  Impressive.  And let's be honest.... the USA has not been able to dominate the sprint races since the likes of Matt Biondi in the late 80's!  Sure, Cullen Jones shocked us all as he was not expected to be a "real" contender, but hellllllllooooo Nathan Adrian! 

....I could clearly go on for hours about this topic, but sadly I just do not have the time today to do so.  I promise I will dedicate a whole blog to this next week!

CP, Are You With Me?!

It is that time of year again.  The period between May/June and August weddings where there is finally a lull in the summer, when we realize we can finally relax a bit from all of the summer travel obligations and plan some fun excursions of our own.  The time where a group of us intensely plan a trip out east.  And in this moment, east no longer refers to NYC or the east coast, but rather...Sandusky, Ohio!

That's right people, Sandusky.  Home of one of the greatest places on earth, Cedar Point.  I have to admit, I am biased towards Kings Island, having grown up in the Cincinnati area.  It is for the same reason I also hold the firm belief that nothing with such close proximity to Cleveland could possibly be better.  That said, I was pleasantly surprised and can honestly say there may be a chance that present day Cedar Point probably does rival present day Kings Island; however, Paramount's Kings Island from "back in the day" is still #1 in my heart - forever and always!

In other news - looks like both CP and KI have made headlines this week as both were named the most popular amusement parks in the United States!  Now you can see why a trip of this nature is a must have on anyone's annual to do list....

This year, 10 of us are making the trip.  And because we are older, wiser and, above all, wealthier, we took it upon ourselves to pay an extra $50 each to purchase a Fast Lane pass.  In other words, we paid extra money so we can cut everyone in line and not be reprimanded for doing so.  THAT HAPPENED!

Aside from the obvious adventure and fun, there are a few rules we do try to abide by while on this journey - they are as follows:

• Chain restaurants only - this most often includes: Cracker Barrel, Steak & Shake and, our favorite, Outback Steakhouse!  I wish I were kidding, but we feel this is truly part of the "Ohio experience" - I am allowed to say that, because I was made in Ohio.  If anyone else does, it will be deemed offensive.

• Fit in with the locals - this means your attire at any given moment must include at least one of the following pieces: fanny pack, jorts (jean shorts), any form of tank top (preferably with stains or tears) with a swim suit top under it, visible arm tattoo (preferably barbwire or significant other's name), bandanna and/or any showcase of patriotism by way of: American flag, eagle or Harley Davidson.

 

    

• Chick-Fil-A and Dip n' Dots - these are both important components of the complete "in-park" experience!

• Do not be afraid to represent - I know we will be in Sandusky, but it is close enough...Cleveland sucks!  Let's not let them think we are blinded by the greatness that Cedar Point has to offer (See Cincinnati gear below).

• Always have an even number.  Otherwise, you will be forced to implement a rotation policy or end up like this on every ride!

• Allow yourself to be immature - you very rarely will have the opportunity to be act like a kid again!

......Cedar Point, here we come!  

Happy, Happy Day!

There are a lot of reasons to celebrate on this lovely 25th of July!  One of my closest friends got engaged last night!  This one was a long time in the making, so many, many congrats go out to her and her new fiance.  Check out that bling:

In addition to the engagement, today marks the birth dates of the same friend, who is now sporting some hardware on that left hand, as well as my sister-in-law.

Talk about a lot of activity in a 24 hour span....Congrats all around and Happy Birthday wishes to all!

xo.

Busy Bee

This week is has been a bit crazy busy thus far, so I apologize for the lack of posting.  Please, forgive me.  As a "make good" for my inconsistencies, please enjoy the pleasures of the Renaissance Faire memory below:

....as you can see, we nailed it!